- Sumanya Sehgal
My dear future husband,
I am a normal girl who like any other woman of our society has a dream to get married and start a settled life, but not like any other woman, I have a desire to raise kids. It is definitely not about the responsibilities that I will be accustomed to but it is about thinking beyond the meaning of this sacred bond. Are we together just to have a family? Well I know, settling down and having a ‘Family’ is really important but is a family complete only when we have two tiny tots around us? Aren’t we too if are together, living separately from our families, a family in ourselves? Isn’t this bond of vows or the “saatpheras” too strong to desire for bringing in another woman (baby girl) or a man (baby boy) between the both of us?
Why do we seek happiness in “things” that are not within us? It is definitely true that when two souls take vows in marriage, or when they decide to walk on the same path, they admire, imagine and fantasise about so many worldly pleasures, raising a family being the first fantasy. But why can’t we be happy with what we have?
There are times when we desperately desire for a ‘baby boy’ or a ‘baby girl’ and we even are blessed with one, but what happens when they grow up? Let us ask ourselves: Were we able to fulfil our parent’s desire? Were we able to negate the emotion of selfishness and serve our parents helplessly?
Well, I didn’t. It has been twenty-four good years with them and look, here I am, all set to get married and leave them. Did they ever hold me back? No. Did they ever make me realise that I didn’t serve them with my full potential? No.
My dearest, I would love to have a family. I would love to have kids, I would love to feel the warmth of my child’s delicate embrace but today, I choose not to.
Yours and yours only.